If you had told me a year ago that at turning 31 I would be divorced and living in Europe alone I would have said “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR DAMN MIND!” But here we are. When turning 30 I had not planned on doing a 180 on my entire life, but I’m so glad that it did. I know now it’s because God has been preparing me for something greater. I have grown in so many ways and I’ve honestly have had one of the best years of my life aside from the heartbreak I’ve endured. From dancing at music festivals all around the country, making new wonderful friends and all the beautiful places I’ve been blessed to visit. They really say your 30’s are the best years of your life and I’m living proof of that. I’ve finally learned to be my own happiness and as cheesy as that sounds, it’s true. It took me a long time to get to this place of peace and acceptance. I’ve probably cried my body weight in tears to be honest. My healing journey has not been easy but I’m slowly but surely getting there. I was definitely naive in thinking I knew how to date but man am I terrible at it. Insert vomit emoji haha. I value authenticity and genuine connections along with also being a hopeless romantic. I am realizing that what I’m looking for is probably not going to be found on a dating (waste my time) app. Even though I’m not in a relationship does not mean I am not rich in love. I have two beautiful parents that support all my decisions and two incredible brothers who set the standard for the type of man I want in my life. I have also gained an amazing sister in law who is giving me a niece very soon whom I cannot wait to love on. I have come to appreciate all that is around me and Love continues to show up in places I never thought possible. The love for sunsets, the love for seeing my students smile, and the love for life itself. I remember struggling with making the decision to leave Denver and move abroad. It had been my home for 7 years as well as where all my friends lived and I resented the fact that I was having to make such big life changes and he wasn’t. I also remember talking to my friend Kevin and he said “You came here for him, but you’re leaving for You” and man was he right. I’ve been trying to find who I am again as I knew exactly who Jessica Binetti was, but who is Jessica Alvarez? This year I met the most broken version of myself but also the strongest. I only hope I can continue to grow into the best version of myself possible. I am and will always be more than enough. A huge Thank You to all those friends that have guided me throughout the most challenging time of my life. But most importantly for making unhinged decisions with me (looking at you Vegas), drinking an unlimited amount of red-bull vodkas, and dancing the nights away with house music. I am forever indebted to you all. Here’s to continuing to make the best out of any situation and knowing God is guiding you through it all, but most importantly to turning 31 but looking 25😉
xoxo Jessy
Journey of Jessy 